The Shenanigan Of Life

According to science, the probability of a human being born is one in 400 trillion! That is a pretty huge number and very rare probability. According to evolution, The first human ancestors appeared between five million and seven million years ago, and the present sized brain was formed 130,000 years ago. We used brain to be where we are now with all the luxuries and comforts. The primary work of the brain is the power to think and simplify things. But there are adverse effects on the same. So what is the Shenanigan (a devious trick used mainly for an underhand purpose) gift of the life? The human brain ability to think. Why did I call it a sneaky trick? Humans tend to use it with care at first, and then overuse it spoiling the purpose of it.

The vital part of thinking is finding a logic to deduce complex problems and convert them into simple solutions. So far it is good, when we overthink, we overcompensate the things, and instead of finding answers, we invent new complicated and unnecessary questions. By unnecessary questions, there come pointless methods to find solutions. What happens when we overthink about a situation in life? We feel stressed. Stress leads to loneliness as we do not want to talk to people when we are stressed. What happens if we do not speak? We become lonely, which leads to depression. Depression leads to much more mental health-related problems. And in the end, there comes that thought, which is the 4th leading cause of death for adults ages 18-65 that is “Suicide.” Even worst, it is the third leading cause of death in 15-19-year-olds.

 Let us go by the academics of student life for graduation ( The reason I’m talking students is most of the suicides occur at age 15-19). For suppose there are 10,000 good seats of engineering which include top colleges and universities, and the student who writes the exam to get selected is 10 Lakhs. First and foremost, this equation is very illogical and dangerous. Illogical equation because, how is it a students fault when there only 10,000 good engineering college seats in the whole nation? Isn’t the responsibility of the colleges and the government to improve the standards? Dangerous equation because the student is literally compared to all the objects in the universe by the parents, relatives, etc., and it creates a trauma. These people never question the government or the university to improve the standards.

Let us consider a scenario to understand the difference between thinking and overthinking. What is the basic concept of the exam? Some professor, who is located in some part of the country, prepare a question paper, which he feels is necessary and asks students these ten lakhs students to answer, from which another professor evaluates and picks the 10,000 candidates. For suppose a student is not among the group of 10,000. Logically a student has to think in the following way, “according to 2 people from the 7.8 billion people in the world, think I’m not eligible for this course, for the questions I answered this year. Let us give it another try or try a different one.” But is the student thinking in the same way? Nope, they Complicate it and think, ” I’m useless compared to 10,000 students who got the seat. My dreams are shattered! Everybody got the same questions, then why didn’t I get the seat?” By this overthinking and added parental pressure, their suicidal tendency increases and some of them end their life. 

There are other causes of suicides in youngsters as well. A couple of them are love and career choices. Why do people commit suicide due to love? What is love? You like a person because of their qualities and want that person to be with you forever because it makes you happy. What should anyone think when their love is rejected by the other person? They should think, “I’m rejected by this person because they didn’t like the qualities I have. I’m living with these qualities since all the past years. I’m sure I will find the one who likes me.” But they complicate it and think, “I’m rejected by the person of my dreams! What is the purpose of living? I cant face reality any more.” Same goes with the career. In a company, one manager by this knowledge thought a person is not eligible for the promotion and rejected them. They take it personally by overthinking and end their life. We always say that people should have opinions. What is an opinion? It is an idea on something which you developed by your own knowledge and thinking. Why are we not applying the same opinionated thinking before ending life?

In the end, any problem in life has a simple solution if we think logically, but we complicate the things and spoil our mental health. As I said at the start, the probability of a human being born is 1 in one in 400 trillion. Let us not spoil the beauty of the formation by ending it abruptly. Let us find the right solutions for the problem by thinking and not overthinking.

Links for reference:

W.H.O on suicides:

Do you know your partner’s love language?

By- Gaytari Agarwal

Why do we see so many heartbreaks now than ever? What is it that’s lacking? What are the signals we don’t understand? Love is a beautiful feeling, and we can’t deny that, but we always see people running behind people and love. If the love is pure, why does one need to run behind it? Nothing can indeed be forced, and it applies to love as well.

So what’s with the failed love stories and incompatibility? 

Are you and your partner speaking the same love language? If not talk. But do you both understand each other’s love language?

You may ask what love language is, it’s understanding and decoding the different ways of showing the love that will help you grow and nurture your relationship. 

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There are five love languages:

1. Acts of Service: Which means your partner believes in – ‘actions speak louder than words’. Wherein, one needs to understand that the best way to express love to them would be by doing something with them or for them. It can be the smallest of things like – cleaning together or cooking a meal with them wherein the acts are done with positivity and happiness of both the partners.

2. Words of Affirmation: This is precisely the opposite of acts of service. The best way to express to your partner whose language is this would be through words: Words of encouragement, praise, appreciation or a simple question which would show care.

3. Receiving Gifts: A lot of people get this wrong by taking it in terms of ‘materialism’, but that’s not what this is about. It can be a small, straightforward and thoughtful gift to make your partner feel loved. It can be something you have made by yourself for them or got their favourite food on their low day.

That’s how it’s different from Act of Service, wherein the acts are done to help your partner.

4. Physical Touch: The best way to express your love to a partner who speaks thing language would be through physical touch; wherein along with emotional connect there needs to be a physical contact without which the partner would feel a void. No words/actions can do what you can do for your partner just by being there and holding their hand.

5. Quality Time: Ever made your partner feel that you aren’t present with them mentally, despite being right in front of them? That’s precisely what we are talking about here. The partners who speak the language of ‘quality time’ need you to be there for them and only them when time be. They feel comforted and safe, knowing that you have ‘us’ time planned for them wherein there are no interruptions or distractions. 

So these are the 5 love languages, it’s essential for you to understand their love language and for you to showcase your love language to your partner. We can’t always expect them to understand things. You have to share it and tell them; this is how I feel loved the most’; after all, relationships are all about being honest, open and togetherness, aren’t they? Little things matter and those little things would indeed matter the most when they are in your partner’s love language. Won’t they? Can you imagine the smile that would bring on their face?

What’s compatibility at the end of the day? It’s understanding of each other’s love language and making stronger bonds.

 This one is for all the lovers out there, who are still hesitating to speak about this. Go please forward this to your partner and hint them this topic of conversation 😉

 P.S. Spread love and feel loved!

The original sin!

The guiltiest pleasure there always has been sex. We shy away from the very notion of it. We try to behave very asexually, but the inner demon always shouts it out. You know you need it, you still think of it, but you feel guilty. Well, there is no need to be guilty of it. You are not a pervert just by thinking of it. It’s your natural drive asking for you do it. When you feel the urge, it feels the only fact there is, nothing other than sex feels real. But as they say, the post-orgasm demon gets you right after the climactic moment. You feel like shit like you have done an enormous crime.

But you didn’t, you just got mischievous that’s all! But why the guilt? Why do you regret? It’s obviously because of the ban of love in society. Everyone wants it, but everyone has always been against it so much that they made it the original sin.

Society bans you from exploring your sexuality. Everyone becomes a villain, and there’s no one but the internet to tell you what it is. Cigarettes are accepted, even marijuana, but this not-sin always remained a sin! In some countries, people still feel hesitation for calling SEX as SEX. I remember my teacher just skipping the chapter and asking us to read it ourselves.

We have made it a sin for so long that people are feeling sexually repressed. They are taking the wrong measures to fulfil their urges. Rape, one of the causes of rape, is sexual repression. The same logic that legalising weed to control illegal weed rings can be applied to sex. You can legalise single person prostitution instead of making it a ring. But, unlike marijuana, consensual sex isn’t harmful. Neither was it illegal. It’s just looked upon as immoral. How can we reject the very thing that brought us onto the earth? Why not tell your kids about it, before they learn it themselves all wrong? Why not being open about it for just a normal thing it is.

Just like how there are always two extremes for anything, there are people who overdo when they talk about sex. Sex is often shown as the ultimate liberation a human can have in their life. It’s not the only thing you should do! It’s the exact extremism that the guys who ban it are doing. Sex is a normal thing just like how one eats, drinks and shits. It is not your final destination. 

It is one of the basic needs of a human and every sexually reproducing beings. I don’t see dogs being shy about sex. Neither do I see them writing books on why one should never have sex. Of course, they are not as aware as us, not as intelligent as us, but they sure are free and happy than us! 

Talking about sex is not pervy; neither is being open about it. It’s not a one time offer you get in life. You can always get it if you try, there are various other methods to get one laid. To be honest, even I feel guilty writing about it. I’m overcoming my guilt to let you know why it’s okay and not something that is to be regretted.

To reject it is to deny your own identity. Adam and Eve (here, in a metaphorical sense referring to our ancestors) didn’t eat the forbidden fruit, and they just did their part in the course of nature to preserve their race. It got pleasurable and better in evolution, and it’s now an activity people do for fun. 

It’s just simple to speak about sex. Before we fight for the recognition of other sexual orientations, we need first to normalise sex. Why is the identification of all the different genders being a hard struggle? Why are people finding it hard? Because people try to hate or immensely love sex, they have immoralised or over-moralised sex itself. 

We should take it slow and fight for sexual freedom first. It is not to be looked upon as a taboo. Normalise it and educate people about consent. Don’t burden people with moral bullshit. Please don’t make them feel repressed. Explore your own sexual desires, keep the urges in your control. You are only a pervert if you are over-doing it. 

What good have morals done banning the very nature of human? 

Let’s celebrate fitness for a healthier tomorrow

By- Gayatri Agarwal

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Fitness, a term everyone understands but never really pay attention to! In the upgrading and fast-moving world, where new technology comes up every fortnight, we have become so comfortable with the life wherein we want to put in the least physical effort. The technology has simplified many physical challenging or demanding tasks, but it’s also making us lazy and less fit. 

Our ability to carry out daily tasks and routine physical activities without undue fatigue is called physical fitness. But how many times do we actually do our work by ourselves? Physical fitness is much more than doing our job; it’s about building our endurance, strength and keeping our heart healthy throughout.

Your body is your best friend and your home. So it is our responsibility to keep our home clean, full of positivity and strength, isn’t it? Because at the end of the day, that’s the place you are going to live all your life. One should take care of their body as if it were their home. For example, when you see that your home is breaking down from places, the first thing we do is to get it fixed rather than deteriorate the condition from bad to worse. So, why not do the same with our body? When we cling on to bad habits like smoking, alcohol, etc. we know that in the long run, it’s only going to deteriorate our health. So why don’t we fix our habits and keep our body clean and in good condition?

Your body needs you to the most whether it’s yesterday, today or tomorrow. It’s forever going to need YOU, and it’s your responsibility to do the best for it. Living a fit and healthy life is an important goal now more than before, as we have a clearer picture of how an unhealthy lifestyle can impact our everyday lives.

The best part is that now, it’s easier than ever to find resources for a healthier life. With all the information available online, leading a healthy life would be a piece of cake if you have the determination and focus for it. We all know that a healthy body leads to a healthy mind, so what are we waiting for now? We know how to keep our mind positive. 

So let’s all come together for our selves and move towards a healthier life. Because your one step towards fitness today can help reduce or mitigate the risk of any diseases trying to come close to your tomorrow.

It can even be 10 minutes to start with, use those 10 minutes to the maximum and see the happiness and confidence you will feel once you are done. We are in this fit tomorrow, together!

Meditation – Connect, Reconnect & Disconnect

By- Gayatri Agarwal

Yoga is an ancient physical, mental and spiritual practice that originated in India. The word ‘Yoga’ derives from Sanskrit and means to join or to unite, symbolising the union of body and consciousness.
Recognising its universal appeal, on 11 December 2014, the United Nations proclaimed 21 June as the International Day of Yoga.
It is the union of body, mind and soul which ultimately revives one’s spirits and leaves you with a balanced mind and a healthy body.
Now, one must say I indulge in physical fitness, so what’s the point of Yoga? Yoga and physical fitness are two different things…sure they give you peace by fulfilling their respective characteristics, but with Yoga comes meditation. When we talk about meditation, we have to see the holistic image which is engaging, getting involved with oneself as well as participating in the habit of self-love, self-care and most importantly understating oneself.
To meditate is to connect and not connect. Sure it sounds contrary, but that’s the beauty of it. It is to communicate with one’s mind and sou and at that very moment to turn off all the worldly connections. Only when you turn off the link of the world is when you turn yourself off from all the needs, demands, wants, pleasure from the outside and start finding them within yourself.

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To talk about my personal experience, in my journey of being a restless person to being a giver and sending positive thoughts within myself, meditation has played a vital role. There’s a reason why everyone says,’ fal ki chinta mat karo, apne karm acche rakho‘. Our ancestors must have experienced it, and it’s only after that we get such idioms, don’t we?
Meditation teaches you the selfless act of giving, and once you realise what giving means and looks like there’s no turning back!

One must say, how will the breathing pattern ever change my life, it’s anyway something needed for survival. That’s the irony of it we know that breathing is a physical act which is the only vital part of surviving but have we ever realised why is it the single essential aspect of surviving? That’s because that is what travels around your body day and night until you pass away. In scientifical terms, breathing stimulates the nervous system, which runs from the head down to the toe. This activates your relaxation response, reducing your heart rate and blood pressure and lowering stress levels.
Now that we have so much love inside us that we have given out to our loved ones let’s also practice indulging in self-love and care because it genuinely is pure & serene. Just give yourself 10 minutes of time to practice meditation and see how it changes your life for good!
With all the meditation techniques and unending information available on the internet, we sure can begin the art of meditation with ourselves.

Sometimes, it’s okay not to be okay

By- Gayatri Agarwal

A report by the World Health Organisation (WHO) revealed that 7.5 per cent of the Indian population suffers from some form of mental disorder India accounts for nearly 15% of the global mental, neurological and substance abuse disorder burden.
Mental health conditions such as stress, depression, and anxiety may develop due to underlying, life-changing problems.

‘It’s Okay’:
These are the two words every person needs to learn and often say to someone who actually needs to hear them. We have the whole world to judge and put us down but a very few who would say ‘I will be there for you’.
Why? Where has our humanity submerged? Where has all the kindness been lost?
Saying words like ‘I care for you’, ‘Talk to me’, ‘I am listening’, ‘We are in this together ‘and meaning them… this is all it takes to save that person suffering from mental health.

It’s Okay

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  • To not be okay
  • To cry
  • To be flawed
  • To fail
  • To take a stand for oneself even if it means you are against the world
  • To ask for help

Lastly, it’s absolutely okay to be yourself because only when you love oneself is when you can have the confidence to overcome anything.

For people suffering from mental health, here are some tips to boost your mental health:

  1. Maintain a journal for your achievements and things you are grateful for.
  2. Start your day with coffee or green tea.
  3. Experiment with something new, whether its poetry, recipe or anything that makes you feel good.
  4. Share your feeling with close, quality relationships.
  5. Treat yourself with few pieces of chocolate, because chocolate makes everything better.
  6. Feeling anxious? Ping those comedian friends or Netflix the best of people for that laugh.

For the people not suffering from mental health:
It’s the need of the hour to be kind, show more of empathy, and shower the world with love because a person’s greatness lies in giving.